Hello my little ice pops! Thank you all so much for your love and support on my last blog post! It really means a lot! I was surprised to see how many of you are also in toxic situations or have also been in my shoes. It's nice to know I'm not alone, and neither are you. So I wanted to make a post on a few things I've been doing to help recover from the past toxic friendship and learn to love and trust myself again.
1. Write Down Your Feelings
I've been journaling a lot lately, hell I started this blog back up! I feel like journaling though is more relieving because no one sees it but me so I can get as angry or as sad as I want and I never have to worry about who sees it! If you'd like to share your thought in a blog, you can absolutely make it anonymous! They also sell gratitude and mind journals, I got mine at Five Below, where you write down what you're grateful for, your intentions for the day and breathing exercises! I think having that and a regular journal are really great because you can get all your frustration and sadness out in your journal, and then take a break and breathe in your gratitude journal!
2. Connect with Other People
For the longest time, I thought my toxic friend was the only friend I had which is why I was afraid to leave. Without her, I'd be alone. However, I started hanging out with people I wasn't really that close with and they soon became the greatest people I knew! So if you're not that close with someone, reach out to them! They may just be your new best friend! Or if you're in school like me! Join a club! And no, they don't have to be a sorority (I was dropped and honestly I truly think it was a blessing in disguise). There's plenty of other clubs in college where you don't have to pay to be around people who you might end up hating!
3. Try to Find Distractions
I don't know about anyone else, but I always find myself back in past situations and arguments, wishing I had done/said something different. Or just being so upset with myself that I let her get away with everything she put me through. To avoid stressing myself out about the past, I've been finding new ways to distract myself! Whether that be editing, taking pictures, writing, listening to music, etc! I've recently started reading and listening to podcasts and I think they're both great ways to distract yourself from the world around you for a bit.
4. Realize What's Done is Done
Like I mentioned before, I find myself being sucked into the past and being upset for not doing something differently and letting her hurt me over and over again. But it's in the past now, and I can't change the past. The only thing I can change now is the future. And I'm choosing to put myself first, take care of myself and my mind, and surround myself with people I know won't ever treat me like that. So when I find myself having flashbacks, I just breathe and tell myself "it's over, you'll never have to go through that again. she's not apart of your life anymore and doesn't matter, it's ok".
5. Find Your Safe/Happy Place
Now this doesn't have to be a literal place, it could just be something you do or a place you go to in your mind where you feel at peace and safe. I've been doing yoga and meditation with crystals lately and I think it's just so soothing and relaxing. I also really love nature so sometimes I'll just go out in the backyard and lay in the grass for several minutes. Somewhere where you just feel safe and calm.
And those are my tips for starting to recover from a toxic friendship. Again, these are my own personal tips that I've been doing, and this is just the beginning, I still have a lot of healing to do. But I hope I was able to help some of you who are in the same situation as me! Thanks so much for reading my little ice pops!
Love you! <3
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